Monday, June 30, 2008

Book Meme

For lack of any other blog is a meme.

I stole this from A Variety of Words. He found Entertainment Weekly's New Classics list on another blog.

I'm just going to bold what I've read. It's interesting to see what are considered the new classics. What I haven't read, I'm really interesting in reading.

1. The Road , Cormac McCarthy (2006)
2. Harry Potter and the Goblet of Fire, J.K. Rowling (2000)
3. Beloved, Toni Morrison (1987)
4. The Liars’ Club, Mary Karr (1995)
5. American Pastoral, Philip Roth (1997)
6. Mystic River, Dennis Lehane (2001)
7. Maus, Art Spiegelman (1986/1991)
8. Selected Stories, Alice Munro (1996)
9. Cold Mountain, Charles Frazier (1997)
10. The Wind-Up Bird Chronicle, Haruki Murakami (1997)
11. Into Thin Air, Jon Krakauer (1997)
12. Blindness, José Saramago (199 8)
13. Watchmen, Alan Moore and Dave Gibbons (1986-87)
14. Black Water, Joyce Carol Oates (1992)
15. A Heartbreaking Work of Staggering Genius, Dave Eggers (2000) My #2 favorite book of all time!
16. The Handmaid’s Tale, Margaret Atwood (1986)
17. Love in the Time of Cholera, Gabriel García Márquez (1988)
18. Rabbit at Rest, John Updike (1990)
19. On Beauty, Zadie Smith (2005)
20. Bridget Jones’s Diary, Helen Fielding (199 8)
21. On Writing, Stephen King (2000)
22. The Brief Wondrous Life of Oscar Wao, Junot Díaz (2007) Reading this now
23. The Ghost Road, Pat Barker (1996)
24. Lonesome Dove, Larry McMurtry (1985)
25. The Joy Luck Club, Amy Tan (1989)
26. Neuromancer, William Gibson (1984)
27. Possession, A.S. Byatt (1990)
28. Naked, David Sedaris (1997) One of my favorite authors
29. Bel Canto, Anne Patchett (2001)
30. Case Histories, Kate Atkinson (2004)
31. The Things They Carried, Tim O’Brien (1990)
32. Parting the Waters, Taylor Branch (198 8)
33. The Year of Magical Thinking, Joan Didion (2005)
34. The Lovely Bones, Alice Sebold (2002)
35. The Line of Beauty, Alan Hollinghurst (2004)
36. Angela’s Ashes, Frank McCourt (1996)
37. Persepolis, Marjane Satrapi (2003)
38. Birds of America, Lorrie Moore (1998)
39. Interpreter of Maladies, Jhumpa Lahiri (2000)
40. His Dark Materials, Philip Pullman (1995-2000)
41. The House on Mango Street, Sandra Cisneros (1984)
42. LaBrava, Elmore Leonard (1983)
43. Borrowed Time, Paul Monette (198 8)
44. Praying for Sheetrock, Melissa Fay Greene (1991)
45. Eva Luna, Isabel Allende (198 8)
46. Sandman, Neil Gaiman (1988-1996)
47. World’s Fair, E.L. Doctorow (1985)
48. The Poisonwood Bible, Barbara Kingsolver (199 8)
49. Clockers, Richard Price (1992)
50. The Corrections, Jonathan Franzen (2001)
51. The Journalist and the Murderer, Janet Malcom (1990)
52. Waiting to Exhale, Terry McMillan (1992)
53. The Amazing Adventures of Kavalier & Clay, Michael Chabon (2000)
54. Jimmy Corrigan, Chris Ware (2000)
55. The Glass Castle, Jeannette Walls (2006)
56. The Night Manager, John le Carré (1993)
57. The Bonfire of the Vanities, Tom Wolfe (1987)
58. Drop City, TC Boyle (2003)
59. Krik? Krak! Edwidge Danticat (1995)
60. Nickel & Dimed, Barbara Ehrenreich (2001)
61. Money, Martin Amis (1985)
62. Last Train To Memphis, Peter Guralnick (1994)
63. Pastoralia, George Saunders (2000)
64. Underworld, Don DeLillo (1997)
65. The Giver, Lois Lowry (1993)
66. A Supposedly Fun Thing I’ll Never Do Again, David Foster Wallace (1997)
67. The Kite Runner, Khaled Hosseini (2003)
68. Fun Home, Alison Bechdel (2006)
69. Secret History, Donna Tartt (1992)
70. Cloud Atlas, David Mitchell (2004)
71. The Spirit Catches You and You Fall Down, Ann Fadiman (1997)
72. The Curious Incident of the Dog in the Night-Time, Mark Haddon (2003)
73. A Prayer for Owen Meany, John Irving (1989)
74. Friday Night Lights, H.G. Bissinger (1990)
75. Cathedral, Raymond Carver (1983)
76. A Sight for Sore Eyes, Ruth Rendell (199 8)
77. The Remains of the Day, Kazuo Ishiguro (1989)
78. Eat, Pray, Love, Elizabeth Gilbert (2006)
79. The Tipping Point, Malcolm Gladwell (2000)
80. Bright Lights, Big City, Jay McInerney (1984)
81. Backlash, Susan Faludi (1991)
82. Atonement, Ian McEwan (2002)
83. The Stone Diaries, Carol Shields (1994)
84. Holes, Louis Sachar (199 8)
85. Gilead, Marilynne Robinson (2004)
86. And the Band Played On, Randy Shilts (1987)
87. The Ruins, Scott Smith (2006)
88. High Fidelity, Nick Hornby (1995)
89. Close Range, Annie Proulx (1999)
90. Comfort Me With Apples, Ruth Reichl (2001)
91. Random Family, Adrian Nicole LeBlanc (2003)
92. Presumed Innocent, Scott Turow (1987)
93. A Thousand Acres, Jane Smiley (1991)
94. Fast Food Nation, Eric Schlosser (2001)
95. Kaaterskill Falls, Allegra Goodman (1998)
96. The Da Vinci Code, Dan Brown (2003)
97. Jesus’ Son, Denis Johnson (1992)
98. The Predators’ Ball, Connie Bruck (198 8)
99. Practical Magic, Alice Hoffman (1995)
100. America (the Book), Jon Stewart/Daily Show (2004)

I wonder, why is a book considered a classic? Can you call a book published in 2007 a classic or should you wait to see how it holds up through time?

Wednesday, June 18, 2008

Birthday Diary

Birthday Diary

So, I'm a birthday person.
I love birthdays...I want people to make a big deal on my birthday. I also try VERY hard to remember the birthday of others and if I can, I try to make a big deal out of it.

I was incredibly surprised when not ONE of my sisters called, emailed or text messaged me on my birthday.
I have four sisters. You would think the odds of ONE of them remembering my birthday would be pretty good, but you thought WRONG.
People I know on the internet but had never met before remembered my birthday, but my blood relatives, my big sisters, my protectors, my other mothers did not.

I think my mother reminded Sister #1 the next day because I got a rushed voice mail wishing me a happy belated birthday.

Sister #2 finally remembered and invited me out to dinner last night. I didn't really want to go to the pity dinner but my mother threatened me so I reluctantly agreed to go. I was perfectly happy pouting about my misfortune of having 4 thoughtless bitches for sisters!

At the dinner, my mom told a story about a woman she knew back in the 60's who bought a brand new Carmen Ghia, quit her job, loaded that tiny car with what little belongings she had, drove to Colorado, got a job the very day she got there and lived happily ever after.

I gazed dreamily out of the window and said, "I have always dreamed about doing that. Just packing my shit in my car and driving to wherever the road leads."
My sister looked at me, puzzled, "But I thought you were going to take care of us, change our adult diapers and push us around in our wheelchairs."

I gave her an antiquated talk-to-the-hand gesture and said, "Are you kidding? You bitches can't even call me on my birthday and you think I'm going to change your diapers? Please!"

It wasn't a horrible birthday, though. I got a lot of good birthday gifts and wishes from a lot of good friends.
I'm just waiting for the city-wide celebration with a parade and a street festival. It's going to happen one day!

PS: Oh! I can't believe I didn't mention the best thing EVER. I ordered a cocktail last night and GOT CARDED! Oh Happy Birthday!

Monday, June 16, 2008

A Good Find aka An Obsession

I was poking through my new favorite bookstore called The Bookish Pelican, when I came across The Complete Short Stories of W. Somerset Maugham.


I couldn't grab it off the shelf fast enough.

Score! Birthday karma!

Wednesday, June 11, 2008

On Getting

How did this happen so fast?
Tomorrow, I will be...well an age that I thought would happen hundreds of years from now. An age so close to 40 that I sort of want to vomit, cry and punch someone all at the same time.
Oh sure, some of you might be older but this IS all about me!

I know I'm getting older because my body is starting to betray me.
I found a few grey hairs.
I have back pain sometimes.
I have tiny wrinkles close to my eyes.
and most shockingly, my breasts aren't exactly where they use to be.

So, why, when we start getting older, do we even celebrate birthdays?
Because we're alive?
Pfft! Big deal. I bet there aren't orthopedic shoes in heaven!

Tuesday, June 3, 2008

Leash Laws Apply

I dreaded today because my tiny little girl Piper had to have surgery.
She had mammary tumors that needed to be removed and checked for cancer.
I got up super early and loaded both dogs in the car for the drive to the island.
After, leaving the quaking dog, I decided it would be nice to take Dashiell for a walk on the beach.
It would be the first time he's been on the beach since I've had him and judging by his reaction when he hit the sand, it was definitely his first time ever.
He was shocked at that sand stuff. It moved under his feet and smelled funny.
It didn't take him long to realize this was pretty cool, so with the leash firmly attached, we took off down the beach.

There were so many things to sniff and pee on that he kept stopping.
Stop, sniff & pee. Stop, sniff & pee.
This went on for a few minutes...until I looked over at Dash as he was smelling a particularly good mound of sand. I was shocked to see a gigantic dog standing right behind my 14lb baby.
Dash was shocked too when he turned around and saw Goliath hovering over him.
Dash became very still as both dogs sniffed each other. I looked up to see who this dog belonged to and I saw a man trailing quite a ways behind but even worse...I saw another dog coming.
I noticed right away that these were both pit bull mixes. I knew this could very possibly end badly.
Dash was fine until the other dog ran up to him. Now two enormous dogs were hovering over him and although I was trying to ply them all with comforting words, I knew Dashiell would crack. And he did. He growled....once....and that was all it took. Both dogs descended on him and in a superhumanly fast move, I scooped him up and held him in both arms.
Those dogs didn't care, they then went after me. Thankfully, they weren't biting but they were jumping on me.
I heard the man, their owner, yelling and I saw him running toward us.
Suddenly, he was flying...yes FLYING in the air and when he came down, he had one dog wrapped in his arms and was wrestling it to the ground trying to attach the leash at the same time.
One down, one to go. The other dog only had eyes for Dash and she kept coming at me.
I had one fist curled up because all I could think about was this wild desire to punch this dog between the eyes.
Luckily before I started abusing this animal, her owner had secured her too.
He asked me if I was ok and if Dash was ok. I just nodded.
I guess I was in shock because I couldn't speak.
"They've never done anything like this before," he said.
That sounded so familiar to me and as I walked down the beach again, I remembered where I had heard came from the owners of the pit bulls that savagely attacked my sister in her driveway less than two years ago.

So, in summary, this incredibly stupid man was walking on the beach with his two pit bull mixes OFF leash and he was surprised when they decided to attack a woman with her small dog ON LEASH.

It wasn't even like there wasn't anyone on the beach at the time either. Ahead of us was a woman with her dog and I noticed she stopped and turned around, headed in the opposite direction.

I wanted to yell at this man. I wanted to ask him how fucking stupid he was. Why would you not put your dogs on a leash on a public beach? But I guess that shock, fear or whatever it was I was feeling put me on auto-pilot and sent me on my way.

Once again, I was lucky. It could have turned out so much worse.

Sunday, June 1, 2008

It's June 1st

and yes it's hurricane season but who cares about that when it's Adam's Birthday??


I know it's not a naked pic, Perv, but it'll have to do!